Match day is the day that every medical student simultaneously looks forward to and dreads. It’s the day that I always dreamed of when I was preparing to go to medical school. My entire medical school career was tailored by me to achieve my dream of child psychiatry. I did advanced electives in psychiatry and even did one at Shodair Children’s Hospital. The Monday of Match week, I eagerly opened my email only to see the words “We are sorry. You did not match.” I was crushed. All of my hard work, long hours of studying and on the wards felt like they went straight down the drain. The week of Match week, when I was supposed to be celebrating, I was trying to get into an unfilled program through SOAP (a supplemental application program for those who do not match). Despite interviewing at several programs, I still did not get a position. I was crushed. That Friday, I watched all of my friends celebrate their matches on the day I dreamed of while I was trying to figure out what to do with my career. Instead of giving into the crushing sadness, I kept working at trying to secure a residency. I reached out to several programs and after several emails and weeks, I interviewed and was accepted to a pediatrics program at the University of North Dakota.
Life doesn’t always go the way you expect. I did not think I would be starting residency as a pediatrics resident. This has not changed my goal of child psychiatry. It just means that I have to take a more creative approach to achieving my goal. In my many ups and downs of medical school, I’ve learned that nothing happens without a reason. I never thought I would be a rural medicine scholar in medical school yet I was and learned so much and gained a greater appreciation of the critical needs of rural Montana. I do not know why I ended up at North Dakota but I am eager to find out why I am sent there. This experience has also been a great lesson in humility. We can plan all we want for our future but sometimes we don’t always get what we want. It is up to us to determine how we respond. Do we give into the depression or fight back, knowing that it will only make us stronger? This path has been hard. It’s been emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually draining but I know that at the end of the day, it will make me a better person and physician.
Michael Fuller-Paulsen
Carroll College Class of 2020
University of Washington School of Medicine Class of 2025
University of North Dakota Pediatrics Residency PGY1